https://nitter.net/ask_aubry/status/1695204791968821483 (in case you don’t have twitter (X))
Immediate dissent threatens to cause a feminist civil war:
This is what happens when males arent cuck caged 24/7:
E-thot vs radfem discourse is so hot right now:
How dare he have preferences, his cake but not his choice smh:
Using big words doesn’t make you any less misogynistic chud:
Black girl voices opinion, immediately gets her credentials attacked:
THEY’RE ALL SO MAD:
Beware of moids using psych terms, only foids are allowed to do that:
This is the Twitter equivalent of the Syrian Civil War except 1000% more male feminists:
The pickme faction launches a surprise attack to no ones surprise:
Make sure to jizz in your gfs coffee as a small additional element folks:
Pretty good troll maybe:
Way too much to catalogue. Browse at your own displeasure.
How bored are these people
Everybody thinking it’s about the cake when it’s not at all about the cake.
The event is a metaphor for how both people in the relationship are incapable of effective communication. Don’t think about it as a single event, imagine this as the 100th time something like this has happened, both of them 99 times brushing it off, but eventually snapping.
Most of the worst fights I’ve been in throughout my relationships have been sparked by something stupid like this, but the fight isn’t ever about the cake. The fight is about all the other times there was a slight, a feeling of disrespect, a failure to understand each others’ needs. I broke up with someone once over a vegetable while making dinner - it wasn’t about the vegetable, it was about both of us being unwilling to compromise for each others’ idiosyncrasies, which had already happened dozens of times before we were unable to agree on a vegetable. The vegetable just made me realize the root problem.
This is also why the AITA story is useless to make any judgments on. If she has a consistent pattern of ignoring his requests, then she’s the problem. If he has a consistent pattern of being ungrateful, he’s the problem. High likelihood both are the problem to some degree, but no way to know without investigating the pattern of behavior over a long period.
Death by a thousand paper cuts
what’s so metaphorical about this case?
Took me a while to find it but:
The vegetable just made me realize the root problem
Must have been potatoes vs yams.
“You asked me what cake I like, then you didn’t bake me that cake, then you were upset that I expressed disappointment that I didn’t get the cake I said I liked after you asked me what I like”
is a metaphor for the more abstract concept of
“you prioritize your desire to impress me over actually pleasing me, and I do not recognize the importance appreciating your efforts even when they fall short, and both of us are too self-absorbed to understand the emotional needs of the other and make compromises so we can both feel loved”
Both sides are valid for feeling a little upset. They both sound like assholes, and they weren’t able to communicate about it effectively at all. Ignored each others feelings. This relationship was doomed long before this.
This is a hill I’m gonna die on. The guy had absolutely no valid reason for being upset. He got free cake. When he was asked what he thought of it, instead of being nice in any way at all, he came out the gate being mean about it. His problem isn’t that he doesn’t like vanilla; he does like vanilla, and has enjoyed it before. His problem is that there was vanilla in a place that he didn’t explicitly demand it.
I would absolutely respond like his girlfriend if my girlfriend said anything like “if I wanted vanilla in the cake, I would have asked for vanilla in the cake.” It was a gift. I slaved over a hot stove for hours to make this cake, and she’s gonna pull the “I will order my own and get my money back if they don’t do it like I want it?” I gotta say, it’s the most creative way I’ve ever heard of forcing your SO to break up with you
He’s an asshole for sure. But she also shouldn’t of asked him what kind of cake he wanted and then just ignored him.
But she didn’t??? She made him devil’s food cake??? That cake isn’t defined by the chocolate frosting between the layers
masterclass in writing bait tbh
It’s just cake.
A lot of insults at the guy from the women here. “He’s an asshole, period”, “allowed to have a tantrum”, “only a child would have a pouting tantrum”, “being a giant manchild”.
Am I a women? Because I’m absolutely calling this dude a manchild
Everyone is weird. Why didn’t she make what he wanted when she asked? Dude was pretty dumb and could just accepted the nice thing. She coulda just said, sorry. Dude fucking posted the drama on twitter with a whole “birthdays are special!!” whining. People are stupid for making a big deal out of it. I’m dumb for writing this.
Both sides blowing this out of proportion simply because they think the other side is overreacting, when both sides should just shut the Fuck up and eat cake
Who eat cake on birthday Mid
The only real take
Ice cream cake is where it’s at
I eat ass cream cake
People arguing over a cake. But I find it weird that there are people in their 30s that still celebrate their birthday like it’s some special occasion. You celebrate birthdays as a child. Not an adult lmao.
As an adult, I can buy my own cake. Splurge on my own gifts. I have zero expectation for anybody to remember my “special day”, let alone do anything special or receive any gift.
Probably unpopular opinion. I’ll take my downvotes.
I mean you’re free to celebrate or not how you prefer, but I don’t think it’s necessarily childish that other people celebrate differently than you. I would expect any downvotes you receive to be based more on the wording you chose.
Why not celebrate at any age?
The only difference is that, as you grow older, you do different things that make you happy. Different things can become special occasions. This may or may not include a cake.
Most of the times, for a person in their 30s, a special occasion is finally getting some peace and quiet from everything. Maybe even treating themselves a little with something expensive.
It’s a little too cynical to say that “you don’t celebrate your birthdays as an adult” IMHO.
But I will agree, it’s ridiculous that the arguments came up at all over a cake lol
You can though, and it’s nice and it’s also nice when people try to make it nice for you to show they appreciate you. It’s good to keep some perspective and remember that realistically it’s just another day and it’s not of cosmic significance and that it’s not super important that you must have the best time down to the last detail as if you’re never going to have another good day ever again but that doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t celebrate nor show love for the people in our lives by helping them to celebrate.
The cause for the tradition is pretty arbitrary and unimportant but it’s only partially about it being your nth time around the sun and mostly an excuse to feel happy and for people around you to demonstrate affection in a way that wouldn’t be practical or special 24/7.
I agree it is very childish. We all grow up and after a certain age we realize that the day you were born is the day all your problems and struggle started. We realize we were disturbed from our peaceful void consciousness sleep for no reason other than increasing our parents’ social status. Then we become efilists and never celebrate our birthday again like rational adults.
This is my favorite discourse of this year, maybe this decade
“What if they ask you what you think about it? Do you just lie?”
YES YOU LIE
YOU MUST LIE TO PRESERVE YOUR SO’S FEELINGS SOMETIMES
If it’s, like, dangerously badly made. If the pan cracked and there’s glass in it. If the eggs were spoiled. Then you can tell the truth and say that it’s inedible. But if it’s a good cake that just has a piece of flair that you didn’t ask for, fucking eat it and enjoy it she made it for you out of the kindness of her heart and you’re complaining that it has a frosting flavor you didn’t ask for
At absolute most you can say “it’s really good, but next time, can it have chocolate frosting inside instead of vanilla?”
That way, you get this cake and more cake later!
Sometimes I hate being on the autistic spectrum, because I KNOW I’d end up making the same scene that this guy did and launch into the exact same petty argument. Well. . .probably. I’m a woman in my case, so I might just be stuck baking the cake myself and never have it come up. It’s not that, to use this guy’s situation as an example, vanilla is bad, it’s that once something is decided, it gets baked (heh) into my head, so any deviation from what was explicitly established throws me off hard enough that I start feeling way less logical and appreciative than I would otherwise and acting like a child.
Granted, the response from the woman (and the response neurotypicals tend to give to pushback over minor situations in general) confuses me anyway. It’s. . .cake? It’s not that serious? Since I’m also PICKY, I also very much get having to quickly cover my blunt comments with “I’m not saying this because of anything wrong with your cooking, I swear, the dish was cooked well and looked great, I’m just super finicky and dislike (insert ingredient here).” Which. . .apparently wasn’t enough in this case? Like, it’s not personal. It’s REALLY not personal. If I say I’m not in the mood for vanilla today, it means I’m just not in the mood for vanilla today. I assume it’s the same for this guy. No one is trying to “embarrass you in front of your kids.” How does that reflect on you? You’re not the one eating around a line of vanilla and complaining about home cooking made with love. THAT’S embarrassing. When I eat around stuff, I KNOW I look like a clown and just hope no one cares. Then she tried to intimidate him by threatening to stop doing something nice for him and he. . .gave an admittedly pretty rude but also perfectly fair response in the heat of the moment? Like, he DID overreact, and it’s weird he didn’t notice in retrospect, but HUMANS overreact just by nature, and the response to this both privately and publicly is enough to make me live in existential terror because holy crap, THIS is all it takes to be a pariah?
Is all this drawing battle lines in the sand between neurotypical and neurodivergent people? Finicky people and people who just scoop up anything on their plate? Both? Considering all the women responding to the question, is it partially because he’s a guy and there’s some kind of subtext of assumed misogyny, so to a degree I DON’T have to worry about this? Or is there something else here I’m missing?
EDIT All of which is to say, his behavior was still BAD, and frankly I think he lacks a shocking amount of self awareness, I just GET it. Frankly, I SUPER agree with some of the other comments here that say the core issue here is a communication issue. Neither of these people know how to explain their side, so it’s just. . .two people getting progressively angrier at each other and it turning into a mess.
