Oh no, he laughed it off like water off of a duck’s back. At this point, I just think of it as a quirk of our relationship. I’m more willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, because when push comes to shove, I know he’d have my back. Shit can’t be perfect, but calling it once in a blue helps.
I’ve recently apologized to a friend of over 25 years. One day while we were playing video games, he was making fun of my name as he usually does, and I blew up at him, telling him I didn’t appreciate him saying these things for decades. While my arguments may have been reasonable, my reaction was purely based on my feelings at the moment.
One thing I’ve considered a few years ago was what was I trying to do when I apologize. Was it to make the person who I wronged to feel better, or was is for me to forgive myself? I still wrestle with that thought. I’ve forced an apology or a few in the past, giving them to folks who literally don’t want to hear it, and outcomes never go the way I expect them to.
Sometimes I think we need show ourselves the grace and patience we give to other we love and care about, but be mindful of the entitlements and boundaries we take or push upon.
Is there something from the Mainland that you always thought the Chinese did better, but found out the Americans did better? Anything vice versa?